Here’s the final part to my continuing story. First though, let’s recap. I looked at my life through the stories of Snow White and Rapunzel. Honestly, I would love to “finale” this up with Belle from Beauty and the Beast. However, she doesn’t really fit here. I tried, believe me, I tried. But, the princess I kept coming back to is the one that started this whole journey…Tianna.
Let’s pickup after I got home from my first 4 years of college. You heard me right. I’ve been going to college on and off for close to 20 years. During that time, I earned a Bachelors in both Psychology and Elementary Education. Currently, I’m working on a Masters in Literacy Education. Not that any of this matters in the grand scheme of things.
Anyway, for the last 20ish years, I have had a clear plan for my future. Like Tianna, I worked hard for my small list of goals. My “restaurant” if you will. Unlike Tianna, I didn’t miss out on a ton of invitations to spend time with my friends. What I missed was a lot of “right now” moments. I was so focused on planning for my restaurant (a career, a family of my own, and a lot of traveling) that I didn’t take notice of what was most important.
The Bible says in more than one place and in many different ways to love your neighbor as yourself. I missed this. I was so focused on how to get and keep my life on track with my goals that helping others seemed insignificant. The best part is, one of my career goals was to help kids. I took on three roles that gave me the opportunity to do just that, and I could have done better. See, I turned into my own Shadowman. I did what I needed to do to further my plan. I wheeled and dealed with everyone including God.
This last year, I became a frog. Consequently, I was also on the road to 40. I spent the whole year crying and beating myself up over my missteps. With no husband, two legged children, a career, or traveling done, I felt like I had failed at life. All of these things were voiced to my Ray, my sister and best friend (Pascal or Doc from parts 1 & 2). She listened and always had something insightful to say. I just wasn’t ready to listen. It took a tragedy and two near tragedies over the course of 13 months for me to fully follow my Ray down the path she was leading me.
Enter Mama Odie’s big music number. The point of the song is “when you find out who you are, then you find out what you need.” I realized that the goals and plans I had for myself wasn’t the path that I needed to be walking. Not yet at least. Her point was that Tianna needed love. I have that. What I needed was purpose. God gave me that. “What you do for my brothers and sisters, you do for me” – Matthew 25:40. When I help others, I help God.
My sister joked that she has been the sidekick in all three parts of this trilogy. In reality, I’m hers. I get to be the support character in so many stories. It’s a blessing. Think about it. If you didn’t have a teacher to push you to do your best or simply answer your questions, where would you be? What about that friend or sibling that listens to all your worries, fears, and frustrations? How about that person that holds the door when your hands are full? We have the honor of helping others write their stories while we write our own. Our impact is strong on the lives of everyone we come in contact with, even to someone we simply smile at in the grocery store.
Here’s my challenge for you: don’t focus on writing your story. Be the sidekick for a little bit. Help someone else down the right path. Hold the door open for a stranger. When was the last time you out of the blue offered to help a friend? Trust me, it can be rewarding.